Is it possible to actually be getting LESS pregnant?!?

(Warning- PREGO FEMALE TALK below, weak persons turn back now...)

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Today before my dr's appt I was joking with one of my sisters that I'd probably go in and I'd be LESS dilated and somehow having my pregnancy reverse itself... because now that I am absolutely in a safe baby having zone and completely utterly miserable in every physical, emotional, and hormonal way- it would just be a perfect way to torture me longer.

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And today, that's very nearly what happened. I went to my Doctor, and she listened to the little heartbeat.. and then proceeded to "check" me down under. Usually, I will say she is very gentle and I barely feel any pain at all. It is usually quite unremarkable and we chat easily as she sees how dilated I am, etc...

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Then there is today. She starts to "check" me for "progress" as she calls it, and in the process is starting to feel like she's rummaging through her Mary Poppins never ending bag looking for something that is not to be found. First it pinches a little, then its hurting and really hurting... and before I know it I am like breathing VERY DEEPLY trying to hold back tears. She has me angle so she can try again for a better reach... YIKES!

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I had told her that I would love to have my membranes stripped if possible today so I might have a hope of going into labor before the next winter solstice. But after her search of the holy grail... she then says in a rather surprised tone of voice,

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"Well, this may sound a little strange- but it's almost as if your baby is actually HIGHER up there today than the last time I checked you! I couldn't strip your membranes because when I went to feel for them... the baby's head was too high and when I pushed against it.. she just floated up and had no resistance. She's very high still! Your just making it soo comfy for her in there she doesn't want to come out!"

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AAAAAUUUGGGGHHH!!!!NNNOOOOOO!!!

I want this baby to come NOW- no- not now- YESTERDAY! And be OVER Yesterday!!!! Haven't I ever mentioned that I am not a PATIENT PERSON? And I am extremely fragile right now? And I need this to be over - like- PRONTO?????

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So she says we can set up a (OH NO!) induction for next week. I really wanted to go naturally- well at least naturally up until I get in the hospital and have an epidural-natural. But induction with pitocin and all that yucky stuff? Oh gosh. I don't know if I can bear another day pregnant so I agreed to it. But HOPEFULLY- a miracle can occur and I will go into labor on my own- like- RIGHT NOW

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p.s. Weird Relief- My Dr.'s Office just called to Confirm a scheduled Induction next Wednesday at 9am. I was surprised at my own feeling of utter relief and relaxation that has ensued. I feel calmer, happier, and thankful that there is an end in sight. Maybe this is all I need to go into Labor on my own now!!