Thoughts from The Baby Belly Perspective..

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I am almost 33 weeks and I had a pow-wow with my OB today to check the inners out and see how things are moving along- with my fingers crossed that most everything would be still and unchanged.

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I feel guilty because whenever anyone asks how I am doing the cheeriest response I can muster is , "BIG." This evening I was asked by our Bishop from church (who I saw at the town 4th Friday celebration) that question and he said, "That's what you told me last time!" I said, "Sorry! It's the nicest thing I can think of right now."

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So while I was sitting in my little paper cover-up waist down with the nicest ob doc in the world today I just spilled all my thoughts to her as she nodded empathetically and responded exactly as I would want her to.

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"The hardest part is not knowing if all this pain I am feeling is causing my body to do anything! If I knew that all the tightening and shooting pains in my inner thighs when I move, walk, bend over, sit for too long in one position, and climb stairs was NOT causing me to go into any premature labor, then I could just ignore it and go on. " I spewed to her. She spoke complete understanding to me.

"I just really really want you to take your activity level down a notch. I don't want to have to put you on bed rest. I just want you to lie down for at least 2 hours a day, and take it easier." She entreated me.

I wailed back- "I understand, but that's easier said than done! With two kids going nonstop, and my nursery is nowhere near done.... I just don't know HOW!!"

"Well, it's really important that your baby stay inside you for at LEAST 3-4 more weeks. And even at that I had a mom give birth at 35 weeks recently and her baby was in the NICU for 2 weeks more. So I need to you to slow down for now."

I told her about my darling -just came home from her first year at BYU -little sister who has been waiting on "call" so to speak to come live and be my Nanny as soon as I needed it. My doctor said now would be a good time to take her up on her offer. So after Sunday... thank GOODNESS, I will have some live in help to do some of the harder things for me, like big park trips, and more physical things around the house. I am SO GRATEFUL that she can come!

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We went to the park yesterday. I wish I could better explain to my daughter what the word "sacrifice" means. I said, "Honey, even though we are walking on the big bridge by the park, Mommy can't walk down those 500 stairs to the pretty grassy area by the stream, and unfortunately you can't go by yourself yet."

And she complained and asked "WHY?"

I responded, "Well, we all are going to have to sacrifice a little to make sure that our baby will stay in mommy's tummy long enough to grow big and healthy and not have to be in the hospital."

"What does Sacrifice mean?" She asked, completely lost.

I tried to explain it to the best of my ability, but I am honestly not sure how much she caught.

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I also told my doctor I am feeling like a negligent mother right now, and how HARD it is to let things go around the house that I need to attend to, but know I physically can't or shouldn't.

"You are being the BEST mother you could be right now by protecting that baby! Your kids will be just fine!"

I love my doctor. She is so sweet. And although it nearly drives me insane that I can't keep up on the laundry and cleaning around our house properly... I am glad to know that it's okay, and that by taking care of my body and listening and responding to it I am doing what's best for our little baby.

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And hopefully, if I DO take my activity level down a notch.. I can still squeeze one or two projects in and NOT throw myself into early labor. =) Maybe I'll trade cleaning & laundry for sewing and painting baby furniture...hehe..